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Post Wed Jan 28, 2015 2:06 pm


 Spoiler: personnal thought
I won't comment on "the plan" for obvious reasons but I fully taste the irony of playing the knight in armour AND being trapped in a dungeon waiting to be rescued... ;)
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Post Wed Jan 28, 2015 7:25 pm


Asslessman wrote:What would Bufo do then ? Bufo would eat, but there was no food to be eaten. Bufo would fart, but Seu couldn't resign to resort to such extreme means...


"Well I can certainly get myself from A to B, but to steal a paladin from under their nose... I think maybe we will need Bufo to demonstrate his unique talents."
 Spoiler: strategy
Regarding getting Seu out I think we will have to play it by ear. I have wraithform which i could use to get myself from Hisstons quarters to the throne room to reunite with you guys. I can only cast that spell on myself. Bufo could escape back down the tunnel. But we would have to invent some way to get Seu out. I have an invisibility i could cast on Bari. I also have lots of illusion and a ventrilloquism for causing a distraction, but nothing for unlocking doors. I think that the "demoness" is basically an illusionist and may not have any direct way of stopping you getting close. Its the snakemen minions which are the danger.

Eggbert pointed to the map with a diminutive finger. "Papa Toe-Toe, might I ask what is known about the white snakeman and his lab?"
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Post Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:20 pm


 Spoiler: DM's APOLOGY
I have been laxer than a laxative relaxing when it comes to updating this game but as JB's complaining reached a fever-pitch I am kicking the cow in the guts, so to speak. I hope you are all still keen to catch that damn mouse! ;)

Papa Toe-Toe appeared to have drifted off into some reverie, so Eggbert's words hung in the air with an awkward heaviness. Suddenly the great kobold snapped back to attention.

"What? Who? What banana? Oh, you lot, hahaha. How are you enjoying the meat? Hmmm? Yes... now where were we?"

The abruptness of Papa's address made Bufo fart nervously with surprise. One of the bully boys shifted and grunted something. Papa's face turned stony.

"Now look here, we have a deal, okay? The contents of that laboratory are mine, and noone, NOONE is to touch it, capisce?"

The flabby monster glared at each of the heroes in turn. A few of them appeared to have got it.

"Now look, i've told you all I can about the layout and what you need to accomplish. There is one more thing I will do and then you will be on your own until such time as the Misstress is defeated." The great dog rapped on the arm of his battered divan and from somewhere there was a yipping commotion. The doors to the chamber flew open and a procession of kobolds came staggering in under the weight of numerous sacks filled with heavy objects. They pushed their way to the great table, where plates of food were shoved aside and drumsticks rolled onto the floor (Duke and Bufo snapped at each other like rabid dogs as they scuttled around trying to snaffle them up). The kobolds upended their sacks on to the table, where weapons and equipment of all shapes, varieties and conditions cascaded across the rough wood.

"BEHOLD!" bellowed Papa Toe-Toe, "I have emptied my grand armoury to aid you in your quest. Take what you need, take it all, use it to defeat the oppressors above!" The big kobold raised his arms in the air in an odd, triumphant pose, as the heroes regarded the pile of weapons. There were certainly usable items there, but nothing much worth crowing about...

 Spoiler: DM's NOTES
Papa has provided you with a selection of weapons, most of them look fairly mundane and all have signs of wear. There are the ones of note:

1 x Bronze Tetsubo (a type of oriental club)
1 x steel mace
2 x tarnished Yuan-Ti khopesh (curvy swords)
2 x dented longswords
assorted daggers
1 x Yuan-Ti longbow (with a quiver of 30 snake themed arrows)
1 x helm, crested with a gaudy plume
2 x battered shields, one snake themed, one has a rat on it

The plan will rely on several things being accomplished in a short amount of time:
1) securing the door will be vital. The mechanism is strong but it has fragile components in the form of gears and pulleys that will foul up if damaged
2) getting Bari close to the Misstress. His remove curse spell is a touch-range spell so he needs to get very very close. Eggbert has established that the Misstress is an illusion covering what appears to be a young woman but the problem with illusions is THEY CAN STILL KILL YOU IF YOU BELIEVE IN THEM. Bari will need to take a test if he is detected to see whether he believes the illusion is not real or he could get diced up. An illusion isn't as deadly as the real thing but it is more than deadly enough to account for a lone cleric.
3) rescuing Seu and Yngwie. There are only two heroes small enough to fit in the passage that leads to the private quarters, and once in, they can't get Seu out the same way. Fighting your way through the temple is an option but not a great one. A party of 4, two shorties and two half dead guys will need to think of some way of either rejoining the group or making their own exit. Perhaps searching their immediate area may turn up something useful... ;)

So, maybe a show of volunteers will help get this game moving again! Hands up who:

1) wants to be in charge of destroying the gate
2) wants to help Bari get to the misstress (and how will you help?)
3) wants to go with Bufo to save the Paladin? (Obviously only Eggbert can volunteer but he doesn't HAVE to).
4) wants to lie around on a torture rack being a big sissy?

Oh and i forgot to include the location of the pit in the last revised map - so here it is. The Pit.

Bari was still not feeling at ease, the memory of giant spider leg pinning him down was still too fresh. Caught in his unsettling thoughts, he almost didn't hear the odd little trilling noise coming from the High Clerist's stave...


"LOVE...... LOVE? LOVE!!"

The giant's voice boomed over mountains and plains, and seemed to shake the world to it's very core. The heap of scooped-up frozen earth beneath Seu's feet began to slide and crumble through the tree-sized fingers and threatened to toppled the battered, armoured warrior.


The sound of the mocking laughter was so loud that Seu's ears gave up and replaced it with a ringing that made him gasp. He fell to his knees, his gauntleted hand still gripping the cold iron Holy Avenger.


The light of the sun was blocked by a giant hand that loomed aboove Seu, ready to come down upon him and crush him like a bug. It seemed to hang there for a really long time...
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Post Thu Mar 12, 2015 2:05 pm


"You can't... I mean you just can't send me to her because she just never leaves my thoughts and heart. Now call me little all you like, a man's worth is not measured by his size but by his actions..."

His grip tightening on the Holy Avenger sword, Seu ran amongst the debris ...

 Spoiler: Seu's actions
Good to be back :D

Seu is going to run till the giant's wrist, if the space permits, he'll jump from the hand toward the giant's heart to dive his holy sword into it. If it's outrageously too far away, he'll just run to his forearm.

Just for fun, here's Seu IRL in the middle of a frozen lake in Canada a month ago...


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Post Fri Mar 13, 2015 8:41 am


 Spoiler: Hurrah!
No actual actions - just saying good to have you back!

Busy preparing for some warhammerage over the weekend, so role play activity will have to wait until at least Sunday.


Always interested in contacting any gamers interested in Warhammer Fantasy 3rd Edition!
Also interested in any old 80's Citadel figures you may want to get rid of.

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Post Tue Apr 28, 2015 1:44 pm


During his run on the giant's hand, Sue wondered about his companions... poor things were probably starving to death, crippled by their fall into the pit, some of them might even have died from the injuries. They were probably alone, desperate, waiting fro him to go and release them from their pain and fears...
Was Robin going to be okay ? he who loved open air and nature above all ?
Was Rambulge going to bear another seperation from friends after being seperated from his mother ?
Was Bari going to... well, Bari would probably be OK as long as he could "cleanse" himself (gosh those mental images)
What about Eggbert ? Seu had heard they could die from missing a meal or for smoking too little, would he stand ?
And Bufo? Wel lBufo wold most probably surronded by fecal matters if he wasn't dead and either way he would be just fine...
And Yngwie ? would his soul bear the load of not being able to avenge his people ?

That was more than he could say, Seu only knew that on such an occasion time for words was past, this was the time for steal and elegant dashes amongst ruins...
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Post Fri May 01, 2015 11:31 pm


"Bufo, let us go together and find Seu, or die trying!"
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Post Sun May 03, 2015 12:52 pm


Bufo looked miserably down at the hanks of meat he held in both hands. Eggbert's words still hung in the air about his ears, like flies hanging about a three day old kobold dropping.

"Yeah, okay, I guess we'll go get Seu. But without the dying part, okay?"

Despite all they had been through, or maybe because of it, the little halfling was actually missing the poncy paladin, and wanted to be out of this horrible, nasty, smelly place. He gathered up what articles he could find that might be of use (there were some rocks he could use in a makeshift sling) and a couple of rusty daggers and nodded at the gnome to show he was ready to roll.

Bari's stave continued making it's funny little trilling sound. Noone seemed to pay it much heed though...


Seu ran like his life depended on it, because it very much did. The shadow of the massive hand descending upon him blocked out all the light from above, and the ground beneath him was sliding and slewing as the earth began crumbling through the frost giant's fingers. Seu slid, jumped, dived and skidded off the palm and made for the long pale forarm with it's forest of strange, icy hairs. The palms of the giant came together with a thunderous clap of noise and a massive blast of displaced air that blew the paladin off his feet, and off the giant - he was plummeting!

The great hanging icy beard of the giant rushed up to meet him, and suddenly he was entangled in the icy strands, grabbing at them as he tumbled and seeing them shatter in his grip. He tumbled head over feet, until he found himself clear of the beard and falling, rushing and tumbling against the body of the creature. He lashed out with his blessed cold iron blade, felt it bite deep, and held on as it sliced a keen line through the pallid skin, a long, smooth tear that slowed his fall. Cold mist gushed from the wound and the monster looked down and gave a mighty howl. Gale force winds buffeted the paladin and he bounced from the giant, the blade tearing from his grasp and spinning away, glittering in the daylight. Seu was now free-falling between the giant's legs, the distant ground coming closer and closer. With a prayer to the lady on his lips, the brave warrior prepared for the end, but with a sudden, painful, limb-wrenching lurch, he was grabbed by something with steely talons and great, sweeping wings. As consciousness fled him, he was aware of only one last though as the rhythmic beating of the wings lulled him into slumber.

Time to go back.


Bufo was worming forward on his stomach, following Eggbert through a tiny, dusty, dirty tunnel that stank like kobold. He had lost track of time completely - for all he knew, they could have been in there for weeks, though it was unlikely as he would probably have eaten the gnome by now otherwise. Bufo had trusted the kobolds when they said he could have fitted in their tunnels, but right now he was really, really regretting that seventh steak. His belly was bulging, and he was painfully aware of it, lying as he was. It was like he had swallowed a child's kick-ball. The gnome didn't seem to be having any difficulty at all - in fact being underground suited his folk rather well, though the smell he could have done without.

"Are we there yet....?" Bufo grumbled. Eggbert whispered back. "It seems we are almost there. Our kobold guide has cautioned us that from now on, any noise we make could potentially be heard by the snakemen. Well, actually, he said 'shuttup, snakes ahead,' but I gather that this was the implication." The gnome trailed off thoughtfully.

Pretty soon they came to a halt - Bufo knew this because he suddenly butted his head on the gnome's boots in the darkness. There was a silent pause, then:

"The kobold says the way is clear for us to exit the tunnel... more or less."

Bufo gulped. He was beginning to have second thoughts about this whole thing. He wondered what the others were doing right now...
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Post Sun May 03, 2015 1:31 pm


Sated of his hunger, the all too familiar feeling of dread passed over Rambulge as he watched poor Bufo and Eggbert head off.
It was crunch time, and there could be no more delay...the spell sword felt like his balls were vanishing.

He took the steel mace and the battered shield emblazoned with a serpent from the pile of weapons on the table and made a few test swipes with the mace.
It felt good to have a weapon in his hand once more.
"I will destroy the gate" he proclaimed, his voice quivering slightly with emotion "or die trying" and he looked down and away dramatically.
The heroism of the moment was tarnished slightly as he set down his weapon and rummaged in his pants for a moment- much to Rambulge's relief his balls were still there.
R.I.P. Dave Brockie, AKA Oderus Urungus

My blog http://leadoralivebruno.blogspot.com.au/2014/06/enter-bruno.html
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Post Sun May 03, 2015 7:50 pm


During his fall, Seu had almost been paralyzed with the ground nearing... "don't look down..." so Seu had looked up... sadly the sight offered from a fall between the giant's legs was even worse and that's when Seu was truly shocked... the pain he suddenly felt as his limbs seemed like ant's in a child's hand got him out of his terror but lead him behind the dark veil of consciousness, the sound of wings the only thing he sensed before...

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