D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City


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Post Mon May 26, 2014 9:43 am

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

Yngwie frowned as a half-naked Bari flopped after the paladin and gnome, who were heading off to find Robin and Bufo. He could see the longing look Rambulge was giving them.

"Oh alright," muttered the elf, "let's go join the fun I suppose..."

___________________________________________

Bufo lay stunned, and could hear the unmistakable sound of a belt being unbuckled, and trousers sliding to the ground. His mind was wandering, flitting off to some happier place, a place where gross guards didn't try to make off with a young halfling's virtues (and heaven's forbid, his victuals). He almost didn't hear the similarly unmistakable sound of a hard object bouncing off a skull, and the dull thud of a body hitting the coarse wooden floor of the carriage.

"That must have hurt..." murmered Bufo, mostly to himself.

"Good," replied a familiar voice. It was Robin.

___________________________________________

Seu tiptoed up to the door, an unnecessary precaution given how noisy the train was, but nevertheless, these things had to be done properly. He gave Eggbert a meaningful look and put his finger over his lips, then burst through the carriage door.

"AHA!" cried the paladin, and then gasped at the sight before him - a tousled looking Bufo and a smug looking Robin standing over a man with no pants on.

"I see," grimaced Eggbert, "so this is how you all operate, is it?"

Bari strode into the carriage and took the scene in with a single glance, smiling and nodding the whole time. Rambulge arrived next, and gibbered slightly. Yngwie entered last, and wished he hadn't entered at all.

"Ye gods!" the elf cried, "what have you done?! That man is an employee of IDRA, you'll get us all thrown in prison again!"

"He is a VERY bad man!" Bufo responded, his wits slowly returning. "He wanted to plunder my wares! My private wares!"

Yngwie shook his head, cursing. "Just what in the nineteen levels of the abyss are we supposed to do with him now? When the other guards find him missing they will search the length of this train for him, and our stop isn't till tomorrow morning! How are we supposed to evade them for the next sixteen hours??"

Bufo looked around for inspiration, but his head was throbbing. "Can't we just... throw him over the side and make it look like an accident...?"
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Post Mon May 26, 2014 10:55 am

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

"Bufo, for the love of the Lady! Why can't we just leave you alone 5 minutes without having you being your mischievous self every occasion the Lady offers?" What happened to that fellow? Have you been trying to rob him Bufo?

Bufo looked at the Paladin with disdain "Eerrr, what part of "He wanted to plunder my private wares" didn't you get?"

But why on earth would someone want to ... to.... get intimate with you? You've been stealing him haven't you? Seu grabbed Bufo by the arm and started looking in the multiple pockets he had seen the Halfling hiding his loot in...

"Food! (drops potatoes on the floor) Food! (drops smoked ham on the floor) Food! (drops a pot of Honey on the floor), just how many people's rations have you robbed? You have enough wine to get an army drunk here!"

We are NOT throwing this man outside !

"Robin, what happened really? I think we should just leave this poor man in the wagon with his food and wine. Eggbert, any chance some of your illusions may lead that man to think he didn't see what he saw or that his companions think he just went for a solo picninc when they find him like this?"

Bari lowered himself "wooo it's cold!" (his hanging jewels had just made contact with the cold steel ground) . He turned the inconscious man face up and looked at the dropped pants "BUfo, that man had a quite a crush on you! You don't know what a time you missed brother !"
Last edited by Asslessman on Tue May 27, 2014 12:02 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Post Mon May 26, 2014 9:05 pm

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

"Private Wares, haha" Rambulge blurted out, feeling more than a little silly when he saw the hardly amused look the Paladin shot him.
He looked up to Seu Antheus and he chided himself for his unguarded giggle.
R.I.P. Dave Brockie, AKA Oderus Urungus

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Post Thu May 29, 2014 8:45 pm

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

Maybe we can stand him in a corner with a lampshade on his head and hope nobody notices. Failing that, maybe a small illusion is called for. It will be more convincing if I had an idea how he speaks.
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Post Thu May 29, 2014 10:07 pm

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

Bufo considered Eggbert's statement and wrinkled his nose with concentration, trying to recall what the man had sounded like.

"Well," the halfling began, "he had a funny accent. Umm. He sounded nasty. Like a nasty old perv." Bufo nodded, then noted the less than satisfied look on the gnome's face. "You know what I mean, right? ".
The gnome shook his head slowly.
"Well, that's all I've got!" complained the little thief. He was a bit cross that he had gone to the trouble of getting them all food, at great risk to his personal liberties, yet somehow he was in trouble again! Honestly...

Yngwie looked at the prone man on the ground. "What did you have in mind, master Eggbert? Is it worth waking him up for?"
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Post Sat May 31, 2014 7:51 pm

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

"Yes it seems we will have to wake him up. Maybe we can come up with some way to keep him quiet. A ghostly visitation might work. Now what can we use to keep him silent? Maybe some terrible misdeeds in the past? The ghost of a previous victim of his amorous advances? Yes maybe that is the way to go about it. so who wants to do a spot of haunting?"
 Spoiler: spell idea
the plan would be to cast invisiblity sphere (i am basing my underdstanding of the spell on this http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/SRD:Invisi ... phere) covering anyone who wants to do some haunting, but not Herbert, so we have to go some distance away first. Then we can move objects around the room mysteriously. If anyone has a lantern or something we can make it invisible so a spoooky light comes from nowhere.
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Post Mon Jun 02, 2014 12:42 am

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

 Spoiler: DM's NOTES
Eggbert's spell will work as stated - and you can perform actions other than an overt attack without 'decloaking'. All those who wish to participate can give me a decription of what actions they want to do in order to 'haunt' Herbert - I will then detail how it all plays out :D As for the lantern, the party doesn't have one that I'm aware of, but Seu's sword Flamebrand can light up like a flaming torch...


Yngwie shrugged his shoulders in helpless anguish. "Well, I suppose we have nothing to lose by trying Eggbert's plan..."

Bufo frowned. "I still say it'd be simpler to chuck him over the side," the halfling grumbled, but he moved to the next carriage at the gnome's request so he could cast his spell of invisibility over them.
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Post Mon Jun 02, 2014 8:42 am

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

The childish innocent joy in the paladin's heart at the idea of playing a little trick to BUuo had nearly vanished when they had opened the door to find a half nacked and fully inconscious man on the ground. Eggbert's idea had just re ignited it and Seu now knew he wouldn't be robbed of his fun again...

"Burn baby Burn" the paladin uttered those words with his eyes closed and his soul centered on the blade. The flames had a sort of cleansing effect in the air surrounding it, like if the space around it was made "Good". His blade on fire, Seu took one side of his cloak and covered most of its body under it in a grand gesture. He suddenly bent and started howling in a strange manner under the confused look of his companions.
"Have you never seen ghosts before? My Dad'd Castlle, Wyrmrock Castle, is full of them. I've grown with the spirits of great knights of the past and even made friends with some !"

To say that Seu did not get the interest nor the response he was waiting for would be an understatement. He had certainly not been expecting the funny looks he had and neither the circular index moves on the side of the head.

"Mmpph, nevermind, well, I'm just saying I know one or two little tricks Ghosts tend to play to play with mortals...
There is nothing like multiple voices to drive someone crazy, We could start by whispering all the same phrase so that he hears it from muliple location and become puzzled. The light from Flamebrand could also help him get hallucinated, what do you think? Making him drink the whole wine loot would also be a good way to make his companions doubt everything he says when they see him drunk and talking non-sense"

 Spoiler: Seu idea
The idea would be to drive the guard crazy by making him hear "I know what you did" , "leave him or you will die" "LIAR, MURDERER"or things of the sort, all of us whispering at him while we make some move with Flamebrand, if it works, it could be continued with one voice suggesting "drink a little, you know it makes them go away!"
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Post Tue Jun 03, 2014 3:25 am

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

"That sounds like an excellent course of action" Rambulge offered.
"I was going to suggest tying him to the roof of a carriage, but this is genius"
Once again he felt a little daft after saying too much.
R.I.P. Dave Brockie, AKA Oderus Urungus

My blog http://leadoralivebruno.blogspot.com.au/2014/06/enter-bruno.html
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Post Tue Jun 03, 2014 2:16 pm

Re: D&D ADVENTURE! Chase to the Crystal City

"So it's settled then!" proclaimed Seu Antheus, Paladin of the Lady of the Lake, Companion to Ghosts and Chief Prankster of the Monastery, "now let's all get into position!"

The companions gathered in an adjacent carriage, as Eggbert prepared his spell. Seu was beaming ear-to-ear. Rambulge was chortling giddily. Bari was dangling contentedly. Bufo was still muttering, but the idea of being invisible was beginning to appeal to his thieving instincts. Yngwie and Robin rolled their eyes - this 'plan' seemed immeasurably childish to the elf.
"Just remember," the gnome cautioned as he deftly selected ingredients from his pouches, "the area of invisibility is centred on me, and moves with me. You'll be invisible until you make an attack - so try not to attack anyone - I mean, a physical attack, that is, after all, we are embarking on a mental attack as it were, but that shouldn't effect the spell. No. It shouldn't. It probably won't." Nodding, Eggbert chanted words of arcane power, and - the companions vanished!

"Erm, hey? Guys?" called Bufo, waving his hands in front of him, seeing nothing. "Are you there? Guys?"

A pile of nasty hay stalks floated about the room, eventually expanding in a cloud with a 'wheeeeeeee' as Seu threw it up in the air and danced invisibly about. He jostled a figure, and groped about. "What's this now, a sausage? Bufo, are you eating already?"

"Yeah baby..." said Bari's voice, with a strange tone, "That's a sausage... go on, pull it, pull it off the halfling, pull it man..."

____________________________________________


Herbert groaned. He was lying face down on the filthy floor of the carriage. He spat old hay from between his thick lips and tried to raise himself up - the stabbing pain in his head caused him to slump straight down. He tried again, managing to prop himself up on one arm. He saw something that gave him pause. "What the....?"

A pot of honey was floating in front of his face. Just... hanging there. he reached out to touch it, and.... plop! It fell to the ground. "What in the bloody 'ell...?"

Suddenly the light in the room began dancing about crazily! A bizarre howling sound started emanating from nowhere, as the shadows about the carriage jerked and shifted in an unnatural manner. Objects around the room began levitating - wine bottles, cheese, potatoes - even the honey pot had taken flight once more. Then, the whispering began.

"We've seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen you...."

"We knoooooooooow what you did..."

"Who's there eh? Show yerselves!" Herbert bellowed, rolling over, trying and failing to get to his feet. His pants were tangled around his ankles inextricably, and his frantic attempts to free his feet made his sore head pound harder.

"You're a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!" whispered a voice near his ear that was squeakier than the others. Herbert lashed out with his arm, causing him to unbalance and fall back on the floor of the carriage, cursing as he went. A sausage slapped him about his grizzled chops, and a jug of wine upended over his face.

"BRRRARGH! I'll get ye miserable-" Herbert's angry cried were stifled by a cheese being wedged firmly in his gob.

Bufo was torn between a chuckle and a grimace at the sight of the ungainly man flailing about on the floor, his privates flopping about for all to see. He regretted the terrible waste of food and wine though - it wasn't a vintage he recognised, but booze was booze. Thinking about booze made the halfling realise something... he really, really needed to pee!

"Well," thought the halfling, "it's not technically attacking him, and noone can see me anyway, aaaand who knows, my pee might be invisible too, soooo...."

Bufo's majestic golden stream arced through the air ("oh hey, it's not invisible!") and onto the writhing Herbert, who gargled and gasped as the little thief marinated him thoroughly. Bufo was enjoying himself at last... until his moment was interrupted by voices heard clearly over the sound of the rattling carriages and Seu's bizarre ghost sounds...

"'Erbert? 'Erbert? Where you at, huh?"

The voices were coming from the next carriage over, and they were getting close.

"Tiiiime for us to gooooooo!" warbled Bufo in a fairly un-ghostly manner, tucking his private wares back into his drawers. He began heading for the exit, hoping he wasn't leaving the radius of Eggbert's spell.

"W...wh.... wait...blub... who said that?" spluttered Herbert. He managed to partially free one leg from his trouser mess, but the pant leg had a hold on his foot and flapped about as he tried to kick them off. He looked about himself with wild eyes, trying to catch a glimpse of his invisible tormentors. "I'm in 'ere boys!" he hollered. The sound of tramping boots was not far away...
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